"You don't like me, do you?"

My older daughter is becoming even more of a drama queen than she has been. We've been having some behavioral issues lately, and she's decided that she needs to let me know how she feels, in writing.

Before she could write, she'd scoot notes out into the hall when she was in time out. The note would be a picture of me with a circle around it and a line through it. Then when she learned how to spell "Mama" she'd send out a note with a line through the word.

Now the notes are far more entertaining. A few weeks ago, I packed her off to time out for being rude. She sent a paper airplane out into the hall. The note on it said, "Dear Mama, I dot like you. Love Ella." My comment was that at least she still loved me. Last week she sent out a note that had a picture of me with fangs and the caption "Big Mama, Bad Mama." I have it saved so that I can pull it out and embarass her later.

This morning, after I told her she had to go to her room as soon as she got home from school for being rude, she wrote me a note that said, "You don't like me do you?" I told her that I loved her too much to allow her to behave so badly. She didn't like that answer at all.

I was relieved to find out that it's not just her. One of her best friends, who is the sweetest, most polite little girl I've ever met, has been giving her parents similar problems. Ella has been talking back to us, stomping her feet when she's mad, slamming doors, and sticking out her tongue without opening her mouth (I have a hard time not laughing when she does it). I'm amazed that she does all these things. I would have never dreamed of mouthing off or sticking out my tongue at my mother when I was Ella's age. I would have sooner played in traffic - the risk of death would have been less.

So now I'm stumped - how do I get her to snap out of this phase and how do I react to all the little notes she leaves us. Any suggestions?