Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Consequences

Thank you for all of your comments and suggestions on chore time. It's nice to know I'm not the meanest mom in the world, despite what Ella might think, or that I am the only one going through this.

We did sticker and star charts when the girls were little, but Ella was the only one they worked on. She would do just about anything for a sticker. She's not quite so dumb gullible these days. I had decided on allowance as a reward because both girls have been asking for pocket money to spend on little items and books, and I figured they needed to earn their extra things. We make them split their allowance into spend/save/share banks. Perhaps in the future I can make them put a whole week's allowance into the save and share banks.

I laid down the law with the girls yesterday morning. I told them that I would be setting a 30-minute timer from now on when they have to clean their rooms. Anything that wasn't cleaned up when the timer went off would be taken away. I also told them that if they put up a fight today or tomorrow, I'd cancel tomorrow's playdates. I further threatened to tell their friends and their friends' moms why the playdate had been cancelled. Ella was mortified at the idea of anyone finding out that she was in trouble. Lily could have cared less, but she did get upset at the idea of losing playtime with her friend. Lily's quite the social butterfly.



I didn't want to take away art camp this week because the thing is so freaking expensive. That would be shooting myself in the wallet. And I don't feel I can take away Ella's rock climbing practices until after she goes to Nationals. Not letting her go would punish the team, and we don't want to do that.



After my lecture yesterday, the girls cleaned their room reasonably well and within the allotted time. There was a minor skirmish at one point when Ella didn't think Lily was doing enough, but since they didn't come running to me to tattle, I let it go. Once they finished, I thanked them for their work, and Ella retreated to her closet to pout. When she came out for lunch, she tried to glower and be the Angel of Gloom at the table, but then she got caught up in the conversation and forgot she was angry.



We'll see how long the cooperation lasts before I have to crack down again. But I am resolved to be Mean Mom about this.

5 comments:

Becca said...

you go girl! it's hard to keep it up and be consistent when it is so wearing but it is a lesson they need ot learn

janny226 said...

Good for you! It is so tiring to say the same thing over and over. I need to get more strict with DuckyBoy about chores (and homework, but that's done for the summer now thank goodness). Hearing your story gives me the impetus to do it.

Cathy said...

i'm with janny--i need to get more strict, too. so glad it's going better!

calicobebop said...

Sometimes Mean Mom is the only thing that works. I have to do the timer thing with veggies. Gotta prove I can out-stubborn the kid! :)

Baino said...

Ah it's never ending I'm afraid. I asked Adam to strip his bed and tidy his room yesterday before he went ove to his girlfriend's place. "I want it to look like a hotel room" I said. Well it does but one before the maid's been in to tidy up! Good luck, keep at it.